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Monday, June 3, 2013

Why I'm Craving Bacon

Prelude: I have a sneaking suspicion this post will turn into a very random collection of thoughts that might give you a brief glimpse into how ridiculous my mind truly is. 

I'm craving bacon.

But, before I get to the reason I'm craving it, can I comment on how I can tell the severity of a thunderstorm by how yellow it looks outside before the storm? If it's kind of yellowy or a basic yellow-tinge, there will be thunder and lightning but it won't be severe. If the sky is straight-up amber, then I pretty much know I'll spend the next few hours holding myself and humming while rocking back and forth and watching episodes of The Office on DVD.

Oh yeah, I'm supposed to talk about bacon. Sorry about that.

Do you remember Stephanie Tanner's hairstyle? My sister was cutting M's hair this weekend and she commented that there is a particular hairstyle that some men like to wear that she has dubbed the Stephanie Tanner style. Thankfully, M does not fall into this category, but it still made me think about that show. Turns out, Stephanie was pretty much the weirdest cast member of them all. After she was done with Full House, she (well, not Stephanie, but Jodi Sweetin) decided to get addicted to coke and ecstasy. Niiiice. Good thing she's sober now.

Speaking of sober...the definition of sober (in the form I'm using it) is "not affected by alcohol; not drunk". So, have you heard people using the word "sober" when referencing non-alcoholic things? Like they are sober from drugs, or bad behavior, or cussing, or food, or...DANG I WAS GONNA TALK ABOUT BACON. My bad.

Also, "my bad" shouldn't really be used by anyone over the age of 25 any more. I can't seem to delete that one from my vocabulary along with "the bomb" and "outtie 5000". Why? Why do I continue to talk like I'm from 1997?

Speaking of 1997, my favorite band from that year, The Backstreet Boys, are coming to my city for a concert. The lawn tickets are still available even though the regular tickets SOLD OUT! I mean, how many 26-30 year old women willing to admit that their boyhood crushes are still crushes ARE THERE?! Now, the question is, do I go for the lawn tickets? Is that crossing some sort of creepy line? I mean, they are old too. If they were my age (or...cough...a little younger) when I was 12 or 13 then they are like...

Oh My God.

Kevin Richardson is 41. Kevin Richardson. IS. 41.

My eyeballs are bleeding. What is wrong with me? He's like...13 years younger than my mom. Sigh. I don't know how to end this brief tirade...so I'll just talk about...

Oh yeah, why I'm currently craving bacon....!

I'm craving bacon because I saw and immediately pinned this recipe.

 

Freakin A...pancake dippers with BACON INSIDE. I'm done. For the rest of the day all I will be able to think about is bacon.

And now, you will too. You're welcome! :)

Happy Monday!

~April

Epilogue: It totally did.

4 comments:

  1. A great post. BTW I do not think you have to nix My Bad. It's a classic. Outie 5000, well, maybe that one should go.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Those pancake dippers look delicious! And this post made me feel old ;-).

    ReplyDelete
  3. The bomb is still in my lexicon. I can't out it. I have also said Outie 5000 in the past 2 years and younger people did not know what I meant. WTF.

    The dippers look delicious. I'm down with all bacon things.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Vincent and I made those pancake bacon things and they are amazing. We even added chocolate chips which Vincent loved.

    BTW. I laughed so hard at this post. You are an incredible writer and so funny!!

    My brain works like that too.

    ReplyDelete

Comments make me SO happy! Go ahead...make my day. ;)

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